Every one of us faces instances in life where we do not know the right thing to do. We have social pressures, things that are deemed to be socially acceptable, and sometimes those things replace what is actually just and right before God. I am thankful for every time that what is right and what is acceptable are the same thing, but that is not always so. If you are not careful, you will live life thinking that you are okay because you are doing what is acceptable instead of thinking about what God says about it.
When you come to the story of Joseph and Mary, which is really the story of the Lord Jesus, Matthew 1:18 tells us, “Now the birth of Jesus Christ was on this wise: When as his mother Mary was espoused to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Ghost.” Now, they were not married in the sense that we understand it in America today. They were betrothed. They had not come together, but Mary was with child. Everyone knew what this meant, but everyone was wrong. At this time, no one knew that Mary would be the virgin who would give birth to the Lord Jesus, God the Son.
No one would have known this. Even Joseph would have been limited in his understanding. But the Bible says something remarkable in verse 19, “Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not willing to make her a publick example, was minded to put her away privily.” Had Joseph taken her publicly before the authorities, she may have been killed for committing immorality. Not to do so, to make it a private matter, may have reflected poorly on Joseph to those who found out about Mary’s condition. What Joseph did was not acceptable, but what he did was just.
It is important that when you come to a situation, your first thought not be, “How can I make myself look good and be accepted?” but instead, “What is right and just?” Don’t confuse what is acceptable with what is right. Being just is better than being acceptable, and God credits what Joseph was, a just man, with what Joseph did, being “minded to put her away privily.”
Being acceptable is not necessarily the same thing as being pious or godly. What is acceptable is subject to knowledge. Everyone knew something about Mary, but what they thought they knew was wrong. It is better to know nothing than to know things that are not true.
What is acceptable is subject to culture, the way we do things here and now. Sometimes we think that because something is acceptable in America now, even among good people, it must be absolutely right before God. Many times God’s people have, looking back, found themselves to have been doing something wrong all along because it was socially acceptable at the time and in the culture.
What is acceptable is subject to perceptions. For instance, I nearly resent the way that in camp ministry it is so easy to be more concerned about being sued than it is to be concerned about making sure that campers are safe. Now, I certainly don’t want to be sued. Having insurance is acceptable, but doing right by campers and making sure they are safe is the priority; that is being just.
What is acceptable is subject to selfishness because it comes down to a desire to be accepted as opposed to a desire to do what is just. More than ever before in this country, to do what is just is often times unacceptable. People are accepting things that are morally wrong simply because they are socially acceptable. In Joseph’s case, it would have been very easy for him to do the wrong thing in order to appear acceptable by the standards of his culture.
What would you do if you were in Mary’s shoes? What would you do if you were in Joseph’s shoes? What will you do when you have some sticky situation come up? It is wonderful to be accepted, but it is more important to be accepted by God. That always means doing the right thing with the light that you have.