Proverbs 31:1 The words of king Lemuel, the prophecy that his mother taught him
What comes to your mind when you think of Proverbs 31? Maybe you haven’t thought about it or aren’t familiar with it, but it talks about the virtuous woman. She is sometimes called the Proverbs 31 woman. I knew guys back in college learning to be preachers who were not warmly received when they preached a sermon about this to the girls’ Sunday School class. Why is that? What should be think about Proverbs 31? What is God trying to communicate? Instead of answering that question, let me ask you a few questions and perhaps this will help us think about Proverbs 31 as God would have us to think about it.
First, to whom is this speaking? The Bible talks about the virtuous woman and so there is immediate application to any lady. This has been given by God and the help is specifically for such a lady. So, this is speaking to ladies. However, there is a sense in which God can’t win for losing sometimes because on the one hand, it is easy to kind of resent being compared to the perfect woman, the Proverbs 31 woman, and on the other hand, we think about all the Scripture directly addressed to men that make us think, “Hey, what about ladies?”
For instance, Psalm 1 says, “Blessed is the man.” This is a male. There is a message about blessing and cursing. Is that a passage we preach only to men? Is this only addressed to men? I think it is not. Traditionally when you are talking generically about an unnamed person in the English language, he is referred to as his, he, or him, although this seems to be changing. So, to whom is Proverbs 31 speaking? I would say it is speaking to me and you. Is it specifically talking to ladies? Yes, but it is also speaking to all of us.
Second, who is speaking this? Obviously, God is. If I were to ask this, you might answer that it is Lemuel the king. Someone else may say it is Lemuel’s mother. Verse 1 says, “The words of king Lemuel, the prophecy that his mother taught him.” As you look at the first nine verses, it is King Lemuel speaking, but it is his mother who is speaking through him. She is speaking from the grave, ruling with her character even after she is gone and her son is king. So, this is a mother speaking through a king, and in verse 10 and on it is a king speaking of his mother.
For instance, verse 20 says, “She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.” This is what the king is saying about the virtuous woman. What he is saying is exactly what his mom told him that he should do. Verse 9 says, “Open thy mouth, judge righteously, and plead the cause of the poor and needy.” So, God is speaking these words, but it is also a mother through a king and a king about his mother.
The most important question is, “Who should heed this?” The answer is me and you. You might say, “I’m not a woman.” It is still for you. You might say, “I’m a woman, but I’m not married.” It is still for you. All these things are specifically for ladies, but are all generally things that should be true of all of us. Whether we are talking about industry, compassion, or planning ahead, these are qualities that are good regardless of our position, place, gender, or whatever.
First Timothy 3 gives us the qualifications of a pastor and a deacon. You may not be a pastor or deacon, but all of those qualifications should be true of you and me. If you are not qualified to be a deacon, you probably aren’t living a life that would honor God and help the people around you anyway. I will say perhaps the people who can most influentially apply Proverbs 31 are ladies. It is very interesting that in verse 3 it says, “Give not thy strength unto women.” The mom is speaking here to the king. Even a king can be guided by his mother and ruined by his own vices.
The best way to blunt to truth is to caricature it. For instance, someone says, “People just want ladies to be barefoot, expecting, and in the kitchen all day.” That is wicked and wrong, and is devised to shy us away from what the Bible really does say. We are running from things we ought not run from. I’m not going to run from Proverbs 31. We ought all live it, and specifically it should be a help and encouragement to good ladies everywhere. Is anyone perfect? No, but everyone can be animated by the one who is. That one is God. So, worry less about impressing everyone else and worry more about influencing others with the overflow of your life.