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First Light Blog
Only One Marriage-Killer
If I were to ask you what the primary marriage killers are in 2012, what would make your list: income, in-laws, incompatibility? Think about the first marriage ever, inaugurated at a garden wedding in paradise. Did Adam and Eve have or need an income? Did Adam have a mother-in-law? With whom else could Adam have been compatible if not Eve?
Even a marriage made in Heaven will be tested by Hell; even a marriage made in Heaven will be tested on earth. There is only one marriage-killer. Trials, foes and even poverty have actually been known to strengthen a Christ-centered marriage, but marriage was never the same after sin had slithered into the relationship of man and wife.
How amazing that the first sin ever among humans was pawned off on a couple. The Devil knows that when he foils a family, he gets at least two for the price of one. Sin in the home multiplies the damage done in time and in people.
Until we accurately assess the problem, we will not eagerly accept the answer. As simple as it may sound, the only thing that can ruin your marriage is sin. And the only thing that can heal, help and build your marriage is submission to its’ Designer.
In Season, Out of Season
"Preach, pray, or die!" Every preacher who has walked the halls of a God-honoring Bible college has probably been told at one point or another, "Always be ready to preach! In season or out of season, brother, just be ready." When Paul under inspiration included those...
What Is Your Family Flavor?
My children hated onions before any of them were old enough to order for themselves at McDonald’s. I am not certain that any one of them would have even known what an onion actually was had one fallen from the sky and hit them in the head! Then how in the world did they know with such confidence that they hated onions? I told them.
Now, I never had a family council where I spoke to the evil of onions. It was far less noticeable but far more convincing and consistent than that. It was not even something I intentionally addressed to my kids. I addressed it to the intercom at the drive-through. “I’ll have a number one with everything; NO onions.” That message wasn’t loud or exciting, but it was genuine and routine.
Your tastes will become you child’s diet. Kids notice, copy and exaggerate. I merely say, “Hold the onions”; my children hear, “Hate the onions.” Your children will develop a taste, appetite and diet from their earliest influences.
One’s tastes in hamburgers may be benign, but there are significant life choices that are not. What are the things that make up your family’s culture: the way and why of the things you do. What about your music, news sources, friends, church, school, dinner times and attitudes? Are you even aware of your family’s distinct flavor? What are you deliberately doing to determine your family’s flavor today?
I Own Jerry Rice’s Jersey
In my closet at home is a Denver Broncos #19 jersey. One word is emblazoned across the back: “RICE”. No, I have never played professional football, but Jerry Rice did. And how he played!
Rice set most of the significant NFL records for wide receiver. He has three Super Bowl rings, went to the Pro Bowl thirteen times, scored an all-time record 208 touchdowns, and is in the Pro Football Hall of Fame. But that is not why I have his jersey. Do you know why I have his jersey?
Apart from the most obvious reason, plagiarism, I have the jersey because of the words on the front of the jersey: “Broncos”. You see, there is a difference between love and admiration. While I admired Jerry Rice’s ability for years, I loved the Denver Broncos because they are my team.
In a brief episode few will remember, Jerry Rice considered playing for the Broncos after twenty seasons in the NFL. He later decided to retire, after signing a symbolic one-day contract with the San Francisco 49ers, the team with which he is most associated. But for a brief moment in 2004, my admiration of Jerry Rice’s skill merged with my love for his “team”, and Rice had a new fan. You see, people may admire you for your ability, but they love you for being on their team.
Why Church Groups Stay Together Here
I’ve noticed something about families who enjoy a Family Week vacation here at the Ranch. They are together. Perhaps that “togetherness” should always describe a family, but in a special and deliberate way, they are together for that week.
Families here eat meals together! They talk. They have the time of their lives, in part, because they are doing it together as the institution God created them to be! They come as a family, stay as a family, and leave, perhaps like never before, as a family.
Now, there are a lot of families here during a Family Week. That is good because people make new friends, sometimes life-long friends. Ranch activities are more enjoyable when they are energized by a wide variety of and a large number of families. But at the end of the week, everyone goes home with their family, as a family.
Why wouldn’t this same camp concept of strengthening the institution God created work for the Church, as well? I believe it does! That is why church groups come to the Ranch as a church, enjoy camp as a church, and return home, like never before, as a church group.
Is Camp for Large or Small Groups?
Are you looking for a camp experience that accommodates your youth group’s size? If so, what does that mean? Is this even the right question?
Could I ask you to consider another question? At camp, will your church be a group at all or will your church teens be absorbed into other groups which define the experience for you that week? The truth is, the choice for summer camp is not between a week that accommodates big church groups and one that favors small church groups. The choice is between a week that accommodates church groups and one that does not.
Am I saying that it is intrinsically and always wrong to disband your group for a special event? No. I am asking if it is always helpful and why? Why we are doing what we are doing, are we answering the most important questions, and what are our highest values as a group of local church young people?
May I give you six new questions to consider?
- What will do the most to ensure that revived teens do not go back home to lifeless adults? How could you involve more of your church in more of your camp week?
- What will put your church in the strongest position to follow up on summer decisions the year round?
- What will do the most to help your teens identify as a local church before, during, and after their week at camp?
- What will do the most to endear teens to their church and bolster their confidence that the people in their church can help them?
- What will most encourage your teens to invite their lost friends to camp, and what will best draw those new teens into your church even while at camp?
- What will provide both a target and a catalyst for your church to grow your group in the fifty-one weeks between camping experiences?
Perhaps we should focus more on the group we want to be than on the group we currently are. God made us to grow, and camp can help.
How Growing Groups Use Camp
Something unusual but repeatable happened last week. As I was making preparations on Saturday afternoon at a church where I was to hold revival meetings, a lady walking by the church stopped and asked me if I was the “new preacher”. I assured her that I was not, explained why I was there, and invited her to the revival meetings. Her brief testimony was that a friend had told her she was “beyond hope”. As it turns out, she wasn’t!
She came to our services and continued coming throughout the week. She received assurance of her salvation! She returned to church the week after I and the Team were gone! That is the way it is supposed to work.
Her connection began with me, but her connection was to the church that will stay to disciple her. A nightly week of revival meetings is a great way to reach people, create a habit of help, and draw new people into that local fellowship.
Camp can do the same thing! Time and again we have seen young people come to camp as “visitors” with a church and leave camp a week later as part of that church! How can you make that happen?
- Plan for it. Youth groups that succeed in this endeavor think differently than the rest of us. Bringing “visitors” is part of their plan. Camp is huge in their strategy.
- Look for it. If your teens never look beyond your four walls on a regular basis, they will never bring new teens within those four walls. Start small, start weekly, then use camp as a target. The results could be exponential.
- Work for it. If you encourage a lost teen to come to a special activity, the benefit is one activity. If you make a way for the same teen to come to camp, the benefit is one week! A lot can happen in one week and two bus rides. Make it good! Why not reserve one or two spots and raise money for one or two new campers?
When you leave camp, new teens should like camp and love the Lord, but leave with you! When they get back home, they’ll know more “new” teens where they came from.
The Distance to Camp Doesn’t Matter
Distance is rarely measured in miles. Think about it; are you closer to your mother in Seattle or your cranky neighbor? People would drive across the country to see a loved one when they wouldn’t cross the driveway to endure the guy next door.
Proximity is more a matter of what you believe and who you love than where you live. That is why we are privileged to host friends from Canada to the Caribbean, from the West Coast to the Northeast each summer. That is why it is wise to put your efforts where your heart is. That is why I want to be a new friend to anyone who could use the encouragement due their convictions.
Certainly, “who I love” should be informed by what I believe. This may mean making new friends who embrace the same timeless truth. This may mean making sure that your convictions drive your friendships. I hope this means the Ranch may be a blessing to you!