Proverbs 11:17 The merciful man doeth good to his own soul: but he that is cruel troubleth his own flesh.
Years ago here on Bill Rice Ranch we had a couple of guests one summer named Bill and Pete. They were from Australia. As a ten-year-old boy they gave me a gift by which to remember them, and they signed it. It was a boomerang. A boomerang is something you throw and it comes back. The old joke is, “Did you hear about the guy who got a concussion from trying to throw away his old boomerang?” A boomerang is a thing, but is also something that can happen. If something boomerangs, it is something that is thrown out that comes back to you.
Proverbs 11 is full of boomerangs, things that will come back. Proverbs 11:17 says, “The merciful man doeth good to his own soul: but he that is cruel troubleth his own flesh.” In other words, you don’t get what you want in life, you get what you give. So many people are knocking themselves out to get this or that, but at the end of the day we don’t primarily get what we want, we get what we give. That is why in Proverbs 11 you find words such as “fruit” and “payback.” There is a payday coming, good or bad, and you own it when you give it. “He that is merciful doeth good to his own soul: but he that is cruel troubleth his own flesh.” The Bible says, “He that troubleth his own house shall inherit the wind.” What you are at home, you get back in life.
So many times you may feel helpless because you want things that you do not receive. You are put back in the driver’s seat of agency when you realize that you get what you give. You may not always be able to get what you want, but you can always give what you want. You need to ask yourself, “What do you want?” and “What do you give?” When it comes to control, agency, and decision, you don’t get what you want necessarily, you get what you give.
An example would be mercy. We are all the heroes of our own story. We look through our own eyes. We don’t see things objectively. We don’t get the satellite view that God Himself would receive. So, we know that we are not getting mercy and are not being treated decently. We may not always see when we are not merciful to others. It is very easy to be hard on others, to assume their motives, and then think that people should understand what we did was out of a good heart and the honesty and purity of our own soul. No, you get what you give. He that is merciful does good to his own soul.
You get what you give when it comes to the truth. Verse 18 says, “The wicked worketh a deceitful work: but to him that soweth righteousness shall be a sure [true] reward.” So, some people are invested in the truth, and when they invest and work the truth, they receive the truth.
What about good or evil? Verse 19 says, “As righteousness tendeth to life: so he that pursueth evil pursueth it to his own death.” Verse 27 says, “He that diligently seeketh good procureth favour: but he that seeketh mischief, it shall come unto him.” So, when I give good, I am going to receive good.
Think about generosity. Verse 25 says, “The liberal [generous] soul shall be made fat [prosperous]: and he that watereth shall be watered also himself.” In life it is easy to say, “No one ever thinks about me. No one is ever generous. Everyone is always sarcastic.” I can’t control them or what I receive, but I can control what I give. Am I being generous? Am I being good? Am I being truthful and truth-filled? Am I being merciful? I get what I give.
There is an old story about a man whose friends played a trick on him. He was napping and they rubbed smelly old limburger cheese in his beard. He woke up, smelled this horrible smell, and trying to evade the smell, he ran into the next room. The smell followed him there. He threw open the window, stuck out his head, and gasped for air. The smell was still there. Finally he burst out through the front door, still smelled that cheese in the front yard, and yelled, “The whole world stinks!”
We both know people to whom the whole world stinks. If the whole world stinks, it may not be the world, it may be what you are giving. I have known people who are not oblivious to difficulty, sin, and the problems of the world, but who focus on the beauty. That is because you can’t always control what you get, but you can decide what you will give. You don’t get what you want in life, you get what you give.